Eddie Murphy’s holiday comedy is pa-rum dumb dumb dumb.
Eddie Murphy can get himself back together, as demonstrated in “Dolemite is My Name” and “Coming 2 America,” but this year, he didn’t have much luck with “You People” and now, “Candy Cane Lane.” It’s a lame holiday comedy in which he looks and acts younger than his age suggests as a family man named Chris, who loses his job and finds himself in a fantasy-turned-reality. The plot involves an annual neighborhood decoration contest, known as “Candy Cane Lane,” in which his well-crated wooden decorations are always overshadowed by his neighbor’s (Ken Marino) blow-up balloons, and his only hope is to stumble upon a fantasy Christmas store, whose owner Pepper (Jillian Bell) sells him a set that represents the 12 Days of Christmas.
You know. 12 drummers drumming, 11 pipers piping, 10 lords-a-leaping, 9 ladies dancing, 8 maids-a-milking, 7 swans-a-swimming, 6 geese-a-laying, 5 GOLDEN RING, 4 calling birds, 3 french hens, 2 turtle doves, and a partridge in a pear tree.
He sets it up, and it becomes a success, but to one small hitch. They all come to life. Which means swans are swimming in pool, geese are dropping eggs in the sky, and milkmaids are flooding the school with cow’s milk. What isn’t a kids movie without school messes or people being chased by birds?
It’s all because Pepper is an evil elf, who thinks she can be a Christmas Beetlejuice with her tricks and comedy, and wants to punish the Naughty and Nice. And if he doesn’t get all the golden rings by Christmas Eve, then he will turn into a class miniature figure, like Pip (Nick Offerman with a British accent), Cordelia (Robin Thede), the lamplighter Gary (Chris Redd), and the singing carolers (Pentatonix).
His family life is just as corny and typical as the story gets. His wife Carol (Tracee Ellis Ross) is poised to land a promotion, their teenage daughter Joy (Genneya Walton) wants to study at Notre Dame instead of UCLA, their son Nick (Thaddeus J. Mixson) is better at music than math, and their youngest daughter Holly (Madison Thomas) has the complexity of an adult buddy than an innocent child. Of course, the rising action is when their oldest kids’ dreams get exposed during a prep rally, and the parents act like they don’t know what’s going on with their kids. The boy was acting funny when his folks asked about his math, and the daughter was thinking about going to Notre Dame.
Every once in a while, you get a laugh, like how Chris’ new lights nearly blind pilots in the sky. Every once in a while, you get some nice production designs of the Christmas sets. And you do get David Alan Grier as Santa Clause, who comes to help fix Pepper’s mischief. But they all get overshadowed by the ho ho-hum that is “Candy Cane Lane.” Director Reginald Hudlin (“House Party,” “Boomerang,” “Marshall”) and producers Murphy and Brian Grazer should have done something more lively with the genre, instead of just catering to today’s audience with veteran reporters being replaced by internet influencers (D.C. Young Fly playing one here), schools apparently showing “Frozen” before Christmas break, and how obvious these movie kids are.
Murphy has the opportunity to survive the 2020s as Adam Sandler has lately (“Hustle,” “You Are So Not Invited to My Bat Mitzvah,” and “Leo” being examples), and he does what he can in this movie, but he doesn’t overcome the routine screenplay. Even the posters look as corny as fruit cake, which I’ve never eaten, and don’t really plan to, according to what I’ve been hearing. This won’t go down in history as a holiday classic.
Streaming on Amazon Prime Video