All we have is snake skin.
The 1997 film “Anaconda” was well-made cheese with Jennifer Lopez, Ice Cube, and Jon Voight in the mix. The snake looked real and CGI at the same time, and it had a B-movie attitude that chooses to be funny, slithery, and dopey fun at the same time. And I just watched it on Netflix.
The 2025 version of “Anaconda” wants to honor that film and satirize the rule of reboots or spiritual sequels. But I think we can agree the “Scream” films made by Radio Silence have distinguished that quite well. This one seems more interested in the formulas and cliches of adventure films and IPs than it does on the snakes.
Paul Rudd and Jack Black have both appeared in some of the funniest films of the 2000s like “Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy” and “Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox” story. And they’re both the best things about the film, because of their chemistry and likability. They, along with Steve Zahn (who co-starred with Black in “Saving Silverman”) and Thandiwe Newton play middle aged best friends, who are big fans of the 1997 hit, and decide to make a a spiritual sequel to it. The reasons include Rudd’s character Griff, who is a small time TV actor, telling them he has gained the rights of the film thanks to the widow of the deceased “author,” and the fact that when they were teens, they make a Sasquatch B-horror movie with Al Pacino overtones called “The Quatch.”
Black’s character Doug has a “B+ life” making wedding videos (or “films” as he likes to call them) and supporting his family (there’s that Ione Skye as his wife), which is why he has to be a little cynical about the idea, but soon he comes around and decides to join him on his Amazon adventure. Doug would be the screenwriter and director, Griff would be the producer and play the snake tracker, Claire (Newton) plays the biologist, and Kenny (Zahn) would be the cinematographer (don’t expect him to work on a Yorgos Lanthimos movie). And they also have a snake handler (Selton Melton) with a trained snake, and a mysterious young woman posing as their guide (Daniela Melchior).
And of course, we can tell that girl is really up to no good. She might look like an action hero in the introduction, but then again, we thought Eiza Gonzalez as a bad character in “Fountain of Youth,” which was a bad movie to begin with. And in this movie, Melchior’s character has to be killed off too early. I guess the filmmakers (which includes writer/director Tom Gormican and co-writer Kevin Etten) thought she being the main villain would be too cliche.
Black is no stranger for playing an actor in real life danger in the jungle, and “Tropic Thunder” is proof of that. And he and Rudd both seem to be enjoying satirizing the movie within a movie genre, when it comes to IPs, cameos (Ice Cube and Jennifer Lopez are back), and action movie formulas.
But the thing about “Tropic Thunder” is it had a lot at stake. At the time, it took many risks that couldn’t be done by today’s standards. And outside that, it had big laughs and a passion for blockbusters. This “Anaconda” seems to get the point, but doesn’t seem to be committed to it. The jokes are too safe, regarding Zahn struggling to urinate on Black’s spider bite. And when the trailers have to give away Black’s character surviving a snake attack, you know it tries to make people forget about this movie. I would stick to the one in 1997, because that had the right attitude and knew when the snake could come in. Even if Gary De’Snake in “Zootopia 2” was good, he still moves faster than this snake does.